SAY YES!

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Rule #1.  Say Yes to yourself, about yourself. Do not be afraid to be strong, to know what you want, to state a decision, to stand by your values, to listen to your gut, to dream freely, to expect good, to live freely, to be rich, to like yourself, to make choices for yourself, to surround yourself with love, to anticipate joy each day, to stand out in a crowd, to be different, to believe in health, to love Jesus, to believe in God, to know you are a creator, to allow others their own choices, to stand firm, to be courageous, kind and tolerant, to walk by yourself, to be different than the rest of your family, to love who you love, to be called crazy, delusional and special, to adore life, to be capable, to love everyone and need no one, to do an excellent job, to create with passion, to speak your own terms, to allow without judgement, to hugs trees, to lay in bed all day, to believe in miracles, to leave relationships……………….to create your own life……..to be YOU. 

with enormous love,

Deborah Evans Hogan

http://www.amethystlight.org

 

Roots, Space & Growth

I am a New Englander, for sure – this fall time of year touches my roots, makes me feel warm, secure, nurtured, alive and loved. Oranges sparkle and shine. Me happy. Deeper reasons resonate with me as well this time year  – i like the deep end of the pool. I live from within out, going in, coming from our roots; my happy place. 

 Nature teaches us. I have been busy transplanting trees and bushes which have outgrown their present space. I find it a spiritual experience. How incredible to dig up a living thing, get at its roots, dig a new home for it, pour in some food, water, cover it with soil, make it feel safe and watch it shine. Watch it blossom after a season of  rooting. Being in the cave – magical.

With our recently transplanted dogwood tree, it took a couple of days for the leaves to have life again, but this morning, they do. Such a feeling – praying over it each morning, talking to it, letting it know it is okay…and then the effect of its roots having made a holy connection with its new home……..and it has begun singing. 

Yesterday I moved two hydrangeas – immediately they were happy! In four years they had grown SO large and were touching the house, they needed more room, more space – and this morning, wow! Happiness is pouring forth, they look and feel healthy, happy and grateful. I feel their relief. 

I realized as I walked around our yard this morning, checking in on my plant beloveds….how recently I too, have been giving myself more space, (ah-ha moment!) – more air, more openness. A palpable realization. Divine perfection. 

One facet of self care is giving ourselves enough space to grow. Have you outgrown your room, your home, your relationship,  your thinking, your job? Are your own thoughts too tight for you? Is your dream big enough? Do you feel claustrophobic   in our own skin? No one is comfortable in clothes too tight – and plants do not like pots that are too small and shrubs are not happy being blocked by the house – and we do not thrive in rigidness, or tight thinking, or fearful surroundings. Our roots; they require attention, space and loving respect.

Nature teaches, every time. Give yourself some space, allow your roots to expand. It is the perfect time of year to go within and grow. 

with love,

Deborah

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http://www.amethystlight.org

 

Girl Jumping on the Bridge Wearing Black Jacket

WHAT TICKLES YOUR FANCY?

This phrase from the 1700’s entered my mind a few weeks ago – and is still mulling around.  At this time of so much seriousness, (I mean this…..a lot, a lot of deep, wide, thick, dense seriousness) – so much extreme concern going on weather you are part of day to day 3d linear living or attempting to get your head wrapped around the path of ascension & meditate each day; most of us are in ‘serious mode’. The energy is heavy.  People are generally worried, afraid, concerned. The idea of ‘lightness’ has gone astray.

As I considered what I see as a cannot be ignored foreboding state of seriousness, I heard, “Deborah, what tickles your fancy” ? First I wondered, has any other person even heard this term? Am I truly a dinosaur on this planet? (I still use cloth napkins and have been kidded about that!)  As a phrase, it is quite ‘old fashioned’ – and with words which loose their place in society being removed from updated dictionary’s daily – I wondered; can this term even be discussed? As I offered it to clients/students I realized, I first had to define it for them. (The reactionary quizzical, concerned, deeply serious expression on their faces was the give away.)

So, what tickles your fancy, do you do anything which tickles your fancy?

Huh?

We seem to have reached a time in our civilization that when we do anything, we do it only for the sake of an outcome.  And, not just ANY outcome – but one which will benefit humanity, or get our one year old in the very best pre-school,  or make us more beautiful, or prevent disease, or put green in our colon, or help pass a bill, or impeach a politician, or raise money for this or that, or free this or that, or prevent dissolution of this or that, or help benefit the world in some very real and sincere manner – either our individual lives, our families or globally. There is also the meditating, certifications, schooling, self improvement, yoga, retreating, massaging….. Lots and lots and lots of ways for new & improved us. Let us not forget all the testing to see how smart we are and how far we can go and what our aptitudes are and how great we can be or what missing pieces need work. Then of course we can march against something, or for something or raise money for something; if we have a day off, while we are working three jobs, 16 hour days in order to pay for all the stuff we think we require or the one week vacation we might end up being too tired to enjoy.  Yes, mostly, each an understandable and easy to make it sound an immensely valuable and respectable topic. Yes, mostly very important linear stuff.

For me, I truly believe, doing something just to tickle ones fancy has gotten lost in the fanfare of reacting to life – and like Mr. Timberlake, I want to bring it back…..no, not sexy, (there is way too much of that)…but tickling ones fancy. Doing something for absolutely NO reason at all except it gives you heart felt pleasure, a feeling of preciousness, a moment of blatant non reactionary ‘just cuz’.

The funny thing about seeking the tickling of ones fancy is that it is not done because it will bring us ANYTHING –  and it can bring us everything.

This is NOT going out to dinner because one is tired, or getting a massage because it feels good, or meditating to quell ones mind, or ANYTHING with ANY intention other than; it tickles ones fancy. 

Why did you do that? I like it. The end.

It is not earth shattering.

The other afternoon I invited my husband to go for a drive. I wanted to get to a favorite spot of mine. It’s a view. Just a view. As we drove up to it, the hills came into our sight, i slowed down; we looked. We did not stop, we did not get out, we did not take pictures, we did not DO anything about it; except for a moment, I welcomed and allowed that moment in my day, seeing the hills, a distant mountain range, the light of dusk, fields of dried corn, a turned over pumpkin patch to tickle my fancy. For perhaps ten or fifteen seconds my being-ness felt extremely full and fed and internally alive. And then we drove down the hill and came home.

I love doing things simply because they tickle my fancy. I go to a specific store because it feels better than going to the one closer to me because being in it or the owner or the options or the desk clerk; tickles my fancy.

I stand outside and stop, feel the wind in my face, on my skin; because it tickles my fancy.

Why did you buy that? What is its purpose?

None, except it tickles my fancy.

 

Let’s face it, we are each very driven with doing something for the betterment of something else. We place great value on improving ourselves, the world or others.

So, to re-cap: What is does it mean, to tickle your fancy?

  • doing something that has absolutely no obvious value or means to improve any linear situation except that for an almost unmentionable moment in time – it feels good to you. 

 

And in doing so, it changes everything, lightens everything, ‘alives’ everything; for you.

And, as we know, that does help to shift the dense energy of humanity – one tickle at a time.

with love, Rev Deb

head shot looking down

 

 

the inactive action

growth is an underlying constant. it is at all times in motion; either emotionally, physically or spiritually and usually, all at once. our bodies are always changing – letting go of old cells, increasing or decreasing in height, weight, muscle mass, fat, hair, aging, maturing, organs shifting, blood moving, breath breathing & pulsing us. for most of us, our emotions are consistently shifting from happy to sad, from fear to feeling safe, from highs to lows, from anger to loving, from this to that. spiritually, we are consistently evolving through our physical and emotional experiences; either consciously or not. another words, we are at all times allowing and welcoming love to change us or we are putting up road blocks to accepting love. in any case –  change happens.

as we increase our spiritual muscle, we begin to observe our own external offerings; how we speak to others, how it sounds, what we actually said (sometimes an incredible shocker) – basically, how we present. this increases to being not a consciously intentionally observed practice, into an unexpected experience, as if God says; here, watch this  movie ….see, can you hear the words you spoke……when honored, can be humanly humiliating, in a most raw and honest sense.  one is hearing the words they spoke to another person, hearing them as they were actually stated, feeling them as they were received. this is said to be part of the life review when we pass from our physical instruments, yet it is possible, given ones spiritual awareness, to experience it in body as well.

being present to ones own expression just may be the most humbling teaching i have ever experienced; yet. self love, patience and most of all, kindness is demanded to get through it. and silence. silence of the mouth, the inactive action, as one sits with the comments which caused them to see their own wounds, evidently STILL pressing internal buttons, and causing one to speak thoughts which carry wounded overtones. at this stage, may have been hardly noticed to anyone else outside your very own internal Isness.

at this time of awareness, one not only is watching themselves, but hearing and feeling the words, the choice to speak them and the core reason why they spoke them. they may appear perfectly loving, they may, on the surface, seem even appropriate; but our reason for speaking them is the awakening piece; did it come from (my) unconditional love for the Divine or from my humanhood? – we learn to be with this humbling contemplation, broken open in places we never knew existed, forcing ourselves to surrender all of it. in silence. the unspoken action. do not dilute. be with it. do not discuss. bring to pure consciousness and allow all that can happen to dissolve the human construct of judgement, criticism and ill at ease; dissolve into Love.

the epitome of self care. (for now)

House of Mirrors

Some moments i can see we live in a house of mirrors. Yes, like a fun house, (am i dating myself? https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Funhouse  ) where each step and each turn we keep seeing  ourselves – not always presented in ways we like or appreciate, many times causing us to feel uncomfortable in our own skin.

Life is that fun house. Each day we come up ‘against’ ourselves. Each relationship, each experience, each conversation; if we seek, we can see ourselves. If we have the courage, the curiosity, the faith; we look. When we are honest, we truly see.

Many times the reflection is distorted, like around that corner where we look 400 pounds…that mirror. The reflection is rarely perfect. Perhaps we only see a tiny bit of ourselves in another, or perhaps their anger is an old facet which is still healing, or maybe the other person is reflecting our deepest fears to us, or if we are open to love; perhaps they are reflecting our heart to us?

Some days we have our dreams reflected back to us, our kindness, our caring. Some days we have our distrust, our rigidness, our lack of empathy reflected back to us.

Life is the grand house of mirrors (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/House_of_mirrors). To change the reflection, change your self.

with great love, Deborah

receptive or resistant ?

‘Your life is tailored made for your awakening…but personal perceptions of view misses the beauty….’  — Mooji Baba

‘Nothing is an obstacle but our own thinking, our own arrogance and our own stubbornness with identity…’ — and once again, dear Mooji Baba

Freedom is truly what we seek. Everyone is seeking freedom – when i have that, or this goes away, or i am in love, or that job or this is painful i want to go home……………..or out of this traffic, or away from them or whatever it is; from the mind/ego/personal view – escape-ism is the dream. This causes resistance.

In resistance we are in pain, discomfort, weariness, depression, anxious, sad, troubled. In a state of resistance we are believing the temporary to be the All.

In receptiveness we are centered in the literal Allness of life which has no boundaries and is changeless. In receptiveness we are only in the presence with no thought or view of past or future; for the present fills us with absolute joy which is changeless and absolute.

The joy the Jesus, Buddha, Yogananda and other givers of Truth have shared transcends religion; the Truth is for humanity.

The paradox for the seeker is the path of seeking begins outside of oneself, for the mind is leading…………..to others, to workshops, to books, to certificates, to classes, to knowledge – and eventually leads one back to Oneself, to the absolute & changeless interior knowing of Love – and thereby; in reception.

Which came first? The knowing or the reception? Do all remnants of identity have to be vanished in order to reach knowing? OR do we reach knowing and all aspects of identity vanish?

Ah, for the love of the journey!

Heaven Is Beautiful – the book.

Have you ever had a love affair with a book? I do, all the time. My present book is HEAVEN IS BEAUTIFUL, by Peter Baldwin Panagore. I feel about this book  and the sharing of his words and his story the same way we want to protect a new love..keep it close, no sharing yet, make sure its real before too much talk BUT I want to shout it from the roof tops!!!! Yes, all my clients, students, beloveds, those who know me; buy this book. Read it. Hold it close…and you too – read this book.

PBP shares a story that happened many years ago, when he died, went to heaven’s doorway, communicated with God and chose to come back. As my girlfriend said yesterday, ‘i have read all about near death experiences’. Yes, so have I, but this one IS different, I promise. He wasn’t near – he died.

It is his description of heaven that got me. I knew from my own feelings, my own experiences, my own heart; this is real. He speaks of not being fully connected here, how a part of him is not present, how much he wants to go home, how unattached he is to here. He speaks of God in mystical sensing – wordlessness. He speaks of how we are souls first and bodies second. His language about God will cause your heart memory to vibrate and your soul to remember HOME.

And then right near the end when i thought i was going to burst open with so many rich, delicate awesome God moments of Love, he mentions one of my favorite monastery’s, which is near where I live, where i have been several times, enjoyed chatting with the monks and praying in the church.

If you are afraid of death, read this book.

If you are curious about death, read this book.

If you yearn for home, read this book.

If you are an outdoors-man/woman ice rock climber – read this book.

http://www.peterpanagore.com/

With love, Deborah