In the Every Day, before you poke me…..

I often wonder, about the ‘bigness’ and expansiveness taught these days – I love it too – and it all sings to me, yet I immediately fall back to what about how we as individuals show up right now?  What about bringing in all this huge thinking to a speck in time, a moment in the everyday?

I guess I am always attempting this myself – to show kindness, connection with anyone, love in the grocery store, tolerance with myself and strangers. I am more concerned with how we show up as individuals in the everyday than I am in the bigness of life. Even though I have had many experiences one can call metaphysical, spiritual, etc…..even though I have traveled to the other side and back, had several OOB experiences, worked church ministry for nine years, can communicate soul to soul with those living or passed through the veils, am very comfortable speaking with hundreds or more in a room, …….I am drawn to work with individuals and God made this clear through my life……no, not groups Deborah….an individual – and at first I found it depressing, like I was not good enough or did not know enough to draw large numbers….then, I realized – some of us work with groups and some work with individuals. Not better or less than. Just is.  I have come to honor my ability to sit with one or a few folks at a time and reach in and support their personal journey to freedom. I think of it like a seed, I help you shed the husk, to expose the perfect God seed within. 

Back to the everyday – God in all places at all times in all ways. Even when I get blood drawn. So, here is my pet peeve;  If you are going to put a needle in my arm, you can at least tell me your name, introduce yourself to me, maybe stretch your hand out, my food server tells me their name, so can you. Last week I had a very intimate medical test done, and as the radiologist walked me to the room, I had to ask her name, for she never told me hers, never introduced herself, just stood at the desk, said my name out loud and escorted me to the room asking questions. This simply lacks humanity, not to mention it is rude. 

Connection makes people feel safe, comfortable, seen. I always will ask you your name, look at you in the eyes, want to make contact. I will stop you to do so. And the truth is, one can only be comfortable making connection with others who are already comfortable with themselves. 

It is easy for me to place my faith in God and without judgement (yes, with observation) stop for moment and ask YOU your name before we move forward to sticking me with foreign objects – and we do connect. I forgive you – AND I want you, if you are in any health service industry, please stop, look at your patience eyes and take ten seconds to ask their name, tell them yours, and let them feel a connection through our humanity. Asking my name and birth-date to check it against my wristband is one thing, but ignoring your own introduction is a void. Allow the connection of you introducing yourself; Good Morning, I am Deb, I will be taking your blood today – let it be a moment of CONNECTION. It will allow for a much smoother experience, I promise. As well as dental cleaning, check ups, in an emergency room, or x-ray or even a nurse coming into a room; stop and introduce yourself, please. 

The best moment I ever had with a doctor was a dermatologist who was going to be removing one of those skin cancers from my back. I was sitting on the table and he entered, stopped, came over to me, sat down next to me, look at me with care, introduced him self and asked if I had ever had anything like this done before?  No, I have not. Well, let me explain to you what happens – he introduced his assistant, he talked and then he asked if I had any questions. I felt so seen, so safe, so cared for. It was a beautiful experience. Forever embraced in my heart. 

I realize your days are packed, you have more work than hours in your shift – yet, you also have the ability to make a heart connection with several people in one day, to let them feel their fears quelled and know they are not alone. You may want to take advantage of those opportunities, they are good for you too. 

Shared with love,

Deborah Evans Hogan 

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